Satellite City Episode Guide
“Psycho comedy for deranged angels” – Boyd Clack
Pilot
Pilot
Near a by-pass town at the top of the Rhondda Valley lies ‘Satellite City’, a forgotten part of Wales where the ‘craic’ and the surreal live side by side with the everyday and the extraordinary. But, nothing is what it seems…
Dad, Gwynne, Moira and Randy at the bar!
Series 1
Episode 1
Crisis in the Price household – English lodger Stan is dead, Dad wants a new lodger but Moira doesn’t. Gwynne is too worried about Wildman Richard Stuckley to bother. The doorbell rings – is it Stuckley? A new lodger? Or Mandy in search of an American boyfriend?
Episode 2
Spike Malarky, local fence and rocker, takes a fancy to an executive toy Gwynne brings back from work. Dad, drunk on beer and pickled eggs can’t work out what’s real and what’s not. And who is Roy Orbit’s son?
Episode 3 – Does Broccoli Count?
Love is in the air for Randy and Mandy but why won’t dad buy a new bed? Will Moira be swept off her feet by handsome Postman Pat in Southerndown or will Gwynne change his ways?
Episode 4 – The Other Side
When a visit from the doctor fails to cure Dad’s boils, Randy offers a radical alternative.
Will re-birthing work or is the source of Dad’s illness guilt over the death of his wife, Angharad?
Only a visit to the other side can uncover the truth. Who is the transvestite in the sky?
Episode 5
Either Randy gets a job or it’s back to America for him. But there are no jobs, there’s even a waiting list for scavenging up the trip. Time is against a distraught Dad and Mandy, so when the rough is going the going is rough. Who are the dwarfs with machetes that frighten Bridget? And who have they taken underground?
Episode 6 – Love and Rugby
“He may be a jerk but he’s an American jerk” wails Mandy as she gives Randy an ultimatum of love on international day at Arms Park. As passions rise in love and rugby who will climax first and emerge victorious?
The model married couple – Gwynne and Moira
Series 2
Episode 1 – Hard Sell
A red water bill, a summons from the Poll Tax, and H.P on the ferret cage… Times are hard. It’s shopping at Frank’s Inferior Foods from now on. The Most Evil Man in the Rhondda knows a sucker when he sees one and he sees one in Dad. Can Randy’s interpersonal skills save the day?
Episode 2 – Cutting The Crusts Off His Sandwiches
Dai is in denial. He denied he had the infection, but Rosalie found out. Randy gives Dai a hug and Dad joins in. Mandy and Randy are having problems – Randy isn’t gay mun! All Americans cut the crusts off their sandwiches! But why is Dai cutting the crusts off his? And why has he started washing his underpants?
Episode 3 – The Naked Truth
Gwynne is practising for the pub quiz finals but Mandy has more important considerations on her mind. Is it all right to stand in the nude and have men paint you? Randy”s new age philosophies are tested against harsh, brutal reality and found wanting.
Episode 4 – Life Begins at Forty
Gwynne is in excruciating mental anguish. And he’s been having nightmares too… perhaps it’s his bowel movements or his sexual incompetence. He suggests hypnosis. Gwynne must go back in time to confront the ghosts from his past.
Episode 5 – With A Face Like Mine
Dad wants a grandbaby – a little grandson with a face like his, though he wouldn’t mind a girl, so long as she liked whippet racing… But Gwynne and Moira refuse to procreate. Dad is forced to take desperate measures.
Episode 6 – Bloody Yvonne
Yvonne Lewis is coming to stay! The Sophia Loren of 4B! She didn’t used to wear knickers, or so she told Gwynne anyhow. Yvonne takes Moira out, but leaves Gwynne behind. Gwynne and Dad are forced to eat muesli. How will Gwynne seek his revenge.
Dai “the barman”
Series 3
Episode 1 – Fear and Trembling
The party’s over, the end is nigh; the inspector is coming to inspect the Cosmo, tomorrow! Dai’s let the place go. Something must be done! Moira gets on the case. Gwynne and Dad get down to the cellar. Will Dai be committed to long-term institutional care? And are the Cheesy Wotsits out of date?
Episode 2 – Communications Breakdown
Saturday night and the TV breaks down. But the Price’s can cope… can’t they? A nice meal of goats ankles and a discussion on the plight of the tree frog should keep them entertained. Is dad a murderer? How far is Hawaii from Madrid? And will Mike Barratt EVER return?
Episode 3 – Chronicle of a Death Foretold
Madame Zara is in town to tell eveyone’s fortune. “It’s all rubbish” says Gwynne. But she predicted Eluned Morgan’s quads that time didn’t she? Will Moira ever marry Richard Gere? Will Dai ever be discovered by Hollywood? And does Dad have a tapeworm?
Episode 4 – Never Too Old
Dad has a new friend; a girl-friend. Is she a gold-digger, or just insane? Gwynne thinks sex is for the under-forties, but Dad has a ferret and what”s more, Ellen has one too…
Episode 5 – Survival Of The Fattest
Moira is never going to be Sharon Davies though she’d like to avoid being Ann Widdecombe, but gyms are dangerous places; dens of inequality, and full of Italians. Gwynne is jealous. Has Moira lost interest in sex, and how can Gwynne find out?
Episode 6 – 13 Terminal Street
Randy and Mandy are moving out! How can the family manage without them? They can’t! They must be stopped! But how? Reasoned argument might work, but how is it done…? Dai has an idea – he’s been thinking from side to side again, since Donna taught him how.
Mandy and Randy
Special
From Here to Maternity
Moira is feeling broody, but she doesn’t like babies. Gwynne’s sperm count is low, but you only need one don’t you, if your aim is true… Dad thinks women are not people, but Randy disagrees. What’s going to become of men now it’s the end of the millipede? Gwynne’s fate hangs in the balance…
